TL:DR – Writing smut is possibly not safe for the average human brain.This book is intended for entertainment purposes only and will NOT teach you how to be a smut writer. It is NOT a “how-to” book! Sure, there’s likely some decent advice in here, but take everything with a grain of salt and a shot of the good tequila. This is a rambling, possibly tipsy account of my own personal observations, intended only to make you giggle as we open a window into the bizarre world of writing filth, I mean, “erotica” on a regular basis.
Let me tell you:
– Why stock photos are freakin’ hilarious
– Why watching your mouth in public is crucial
– How voice dictation can be maddening
– How dirty, inappropriate thoughts might consume your life
– How acronyms change in strange ways
This is not necessarily for writers, it’s for regular people who want to read something amusing, and are entertained by the writing life. I make no guarantees, but I guarantee this might be the silliest book you find this month. Secrets from a smut peddlar, or possible insane rantings? It’s the price of a cheap coffee to find out.
(If you’re looking for actual euphemisms for the “man dangle”, consult your nearest search engine like a normal person.)
“Lexie’s a total sleaze, she knows what she’s talking about, I’m pretty sure.” ~ Her Bartender
“Damn, she’s still writing that junk?” ~ Her Friends Who Never See Her Anymore
“I love the way Lexie caresses me, then suddenly gives it to me hard.” ~ Her Laptop
“How’s that schlong writin’ going?” ~ Her Best Friend
18+ only, obviously. This book does not contain any sex scenes, but there is naughty language, and likely a @#$! ton of swears.
If you spit coffee on your laptop from this ridiculousness, the author is not responsible. For anything. She’s pretty freakin’ irresponsible overall. No lawsuits for you.
Look up and to your left for the “Follow this Author” button for updates. For actual naughty books, click on the author’s name. To get on the email list for updates & more, check out LexieRenard.com. Thanks for being one of the cool people who still read.
Paperback version available. You know somebody who needs to unwrap this on their birthday, don't you?